SOCIAL MEDIA

A ME day!

3.20.2007

I had a big ME day today! It was great! This morning I had MOP's from 9am until noon and then I came home, had some lunch and then went out to get my hair cut. I love the haircut, (a bob that's angled a bit in the back - photo is courtesy of Ethan!) and it was so nice to just be able to sit in the waiting room of the salon, flip through some fluff magazines, relax and be just a girl out on the town alone for once! Very, very nice of Ethan to have spent the day with Zoey so that this could happen. I cannot even remember the last time that I got a "real" haircut from someone in a salon, I think I've been cutting my own hair now since after Zoey was born...I didn't want to "waste" the money on something as frivolous as my hair I guess. But, dang, it sure feels good to have lost all that extra dead weight...feeling the moxie about now I think!


Also wanted to share an incredible show that aired on WPR yesterday. A woman was on speaking about being alone and being a woman, investigated the difference of being lonely and the actual state of being alone. And, how we as women often times feel pressure to sacrifice our sense of self in always caring for others first, (i.e. letting others get fancy haircuts before yourself - okay, just had to throw that in there!), but really, we often cater to others needs before our own or before even recognizing our own. It's that whole nurture thing that we have going on. Anyways, it was a beautiful hour of talk radio and I got a lot from it and just thought I'd share, and I have to add that Ethan was listening too and nodding his head many times throughout the segment. :) I think there are so many women that neglect their call of self or belittle it's importance. I know that this is something that I struggled with after first being married and then being a mama for the first time. There was a part of me that thought I was supposed to be absolutely selfless with caring for my husband and for my child and I can honestly say that it was the loneliest time in my life. And it's interesting, because right now in my life I feel as though I am craving alone time with such incredible passion...I am really starting to hear my voice and am starting to realize my needs and I am addressing them! And because of it my whole family is happier. The speaker's name was Florence Falk, she is a psychotherapist and teacher and author of, “On My Own: The Art of Being A Woman Alone. Her website is here and you can listen to the hour long show here.



Women are conditioned to think about others before they think about themselves—whether their partner, husband, family, even friends—so they always stand at the back of the line when it comes to taking time for themselves. And I don't just mean time for a manicure or bubble bath—though that's great, too. I'm talking about time for a woman to focus on herself and pay attention to her deeper needs. This can be anything from time to take unwind, to mourning the departure of a loved one, to reflecting on a new career, to practicing the flute. Any one of these choices is restorative. What's more, everyone benefits. A woman in a relationship can return to it refreshed; a woman alone can discover that she is more resilient and stronger than she ever realized. - Florence Falk



And a question and answer taken from her website:



Q: Can you describe some of the benefits that await a woman who has learned how to be on her own?


A: Having learned through solitude how to listen to what her own voice is telling her, a woman can begin to connect to herself and step into the fullness of selfhood. Self-awareness allows us to change our perspective; we step out of old ways of behaving and begin to live life fully and creatively. We also discover that embracing aloneness does not preclude intimate romantic relationships; on the contrary, the gains of solitude can enhance all our relationships in a new, vital, and more intimate way—from partners to friends to the larger community of women and men of which we are a part.


I think this is powerful stuff!